For the one person who never wears merch — until now.
Some hats are statement pieces. This one is a truce.
The “I’ll Wear This One” Hat is a minimalist black-on-black cap featuring The Empire’s stealth-stitched sigil — subtle enough to pass as “just a hat,” meaningful enough for those who know.
Designed specifically for the emotionally stable partner, the reluctant cult member, and anyone who has ever said the sentence, “Okay, fine, but I’m not wearing anything with a big logo on it.”
Clean. Structured. Zero enthusiasm required.
This item is produced on demand and may take slightly longer to arrive. Patience is part of the ritual.
For the one person who never wears merch — until now.
Some hats are statement pieces. This one is a truce.
The “I’ll Wear This One” Hat is a minimalist black-on-black cap featuring The Empire’s stealth-stitched sigil — subtle enough to pass as “just a hat,” meaningful enough for those who know.
Designed specifically for the emotionally stable partner, the reluctant cult member, and anyone who has ever said the sentence, “Okay, fine, but I’m not wearing anything with a big logo on it.”
Clean. Structured. Zero enthusiasm required.
This item is produced on demand and may take slightly longer to arrive. Patience is part of the ritual.
